What do you call this type of person?

What do you call a person that strongly dislikes to be judged but, always tries to read or predict the moods and thoughts of other? A person that completely denies stuff one minute and then realized that really do, then goes back to denying it? Always gets defensive when you speak the truth to them? That same person loves to run away from shit when you speak the truth only to try and help them? Twists the facts of situations into what they want to believe? I just want to know what kind of person that is...also I've come to a conclusion a person like that isn't worth my my love, time and effort if they look for ever reason for us not to work out...am I wrong for that?

Success

Ok, finally I have let go of the one person who has been causing me so me so much pain in my life for the last 5 months...I have been trying to inform and get my ex to understand I wanted to go back out she fucked up a lot by assuming everything a bout me still even, I loved her and wanted her back....yes she was the best thing that ever happened to me but now it is time for me to move on and try to find someone to love again and possibly spend the rest of my life with. There is so much i could type about this situation and you the read already know but, still the sooner I let it rest the better it is for me. I am officially done! Thank God I let go I feel so much better.

Untitled Poem

To Brooke (Untitled Poem)
Soft Hands
Soft Face
has a body with a wonderful shape
can turn my frowns upside down
can make the rainiest day full of sunshine
draw amazing art
plays an amazing part
in my life
one day I wanted to make her my wife
have kids
grow old
these are moments I now must scold
brown eyes
black hair
my room covered in her underwear
i love it when she used to stare
into my eyes
she'd say there "preety"
and give me "kisseeies"
Many Many
she will always be the queen of my kingdom
even if another king is with her
which seem to be the case
i plan to disappear
and leave without a trace
though the pain she caused me great
i still cannot enforce my hate
i love her now
i always will
she almost made my heart's blood spill
it's all over now
I've tried my best
you truly were the ultimate test.

I hate being stood up...

To the person who did that today, you know who you are.

Helping Hands

I have really begun to get help from lots of people willing to see my projects come together since I have been emailing and going out to ask for help it's almost started pouring in. But, I have a steady little trickle so I am good with what I have. I am taking everything one step at a time, I have people from a few different states that want to work with me, even someone from Canada. I also have music from Unsigned myspace artists that will be getting used in my productions as well. I would like the thank EVERYONE who is contributing to the projects that are going on!

Being Yelled At?

Ok so Alexis B. Decided to read my blog and BLASTED on ME because SHE thinks that she is the one I wrote about in my blog that is pissing me of as far as being reliable, sorry to burst your bubble sweety but, you AIN'T the ONLY person I works with. So, get your factz straight before you come out ya mouth sayin' what you DON'T KNOW. Thank you in ADVANCE.

New Favoirte Movie | New Favorite Director

Slated to be one of the scariest movies ever Diary of the Dead is a movie I have put on my list of favorite before I have even gone to see it. George A. Romero is a great director and I am just now seeing this, however, The style that he uses is amazing and I would love to incorporate such idea into a few of my movies, I am in the process of working on a very violent dramatic short that I wanna def get done this summer and the cool thing is I am giving exposure to the unsigned artist of MySpace, one of which the intro track is already set as the intro music. I also have another idea that I would love to work on, which I may collaborate with Glory D. Productions they have a pretty good short film on You Tube. Check it out!

It's come to my Attention...

I've been moving too fast with some things, and though life is full of procrastination I not gonna be the one sittin' on a couch in a few years still hoping to be the next big thing. Starting tomorrow I am gonna get my sorry, lazy ass up and start doing things, Because I can't and won't keep depending on others to do it for more...or even lend a hand for the much. I have been filled with a lifetime full of people who always say but, never come through, But, Im sorry thats not about to be me. I said I am gonna make it big and I will with or without the people I have chosen to take the ride with me!

Sittin' up in my room...

Chillin, lookin' for jobs watching the snow and planning my next move.

Suicidal?

Yes, it is true that I Antoine Terrell Piegaro McAdams is suicidal...for how long you ask? Since I was 11. Yes, I know that is a really young age to have seriously fucked up thoughts like I did/do. But, Consider you father telling you things like "I want to kill you," and "I'm sorry I had you," your mom being on drugs around the same time and saying she hates you. Having a large family that tells you "You are full of talent and potential," Yet, the constantly contradict EVERYTHING they say to you...only allowing you to be yourself and show you of when their friends come around.
I have been though so much pain nobody on this earth can cure my pain...I try my best to be happy in public as best I can but, lately it's really hard seeing people happy how I used to be before I turned 11. Ever since 11 I grown Annoying to people, I was never really popular, a lot of people hated me because I was so smart as a matter of fact by the time I got to middle school people were so jealous of my scoring high on tests and getting all the answer right people started plotting to beat me up, jump me...fight me and they did to the point where I got so scared I wouldn't even answer in class anymore...which caused me to stay back in middle school and flunk out of high school...
...and since then my life has been degrading, I feel I have no further purpose in life...I've made up my mind I wanna cut life short and no one can stop me.

I've Come to a conclusion...

I need a new girlfriend...I don't ask for much she just has to know where she is going in life already, be 18 - 24 and fully supportive of me as I will do the same for her. I'm tired of games and bullshit excuses, I've heard it all...like "You really did treat me right, but, I've never had that before so I didn't know how to act" and "I felt it was too good to be true..." "I've have things that I have to work on..." well, every girl that I have ever been with knows I am in it for the long run and on top of that I am so tired of the sorry excuses! If you know you have trust issues all your life, why would you even get into a serious relationship without at least mentioning that to your parter? Another thing is that with my last relationship she had a problem with being shy and antisocial...I didn't have a problem with that, but, I actually felt I could take her around my family to meet them, which is like a big day for any guy. The guys are always nervous on days like that because they are worried about how the family will look at the girl...and it will reflect back on him as well and this isn't something I'm making up of course. It's merely common sense, as I have asked many friends and they've all said the same thing. I just am tired of thinking about her...I need to move on, it's been a while since I've had someone to hold and I am hoping this time when I give myself to someone that they actually deserve it.

The Official Launch of KPTV

Yes, it's finally here! The launch of KPTV occurred today @ 12 o'clock noon eastern standard time. It will offer exclusive footage of our up coming series and projects, while also streaming LIVE video of the studio itself. If you are a local artist (NY., NJ. or PA.) and would like to air your music videos on KPTV please contact us at: kptv@katastrophicpruduqkshunz.com

Feel free to check it out.

http://katastrophicpruduqkshunz.com/kptv/

New $h!t

The following is a video Project I recently did for an artist that goes by the name TMS (The Midnite Silence).

Things are really movin' (literally)

Yup so I been doing alot of stuff and things are finally coming together for my company and I am going to soon have to move. I know this is a major set back for all the friends I live close to so I am working hard to get this damn car so I can come and see everyone. Other than that I got a lot going on with KP and with the advent of YBRFilms (Yellow Brick Road Films) I now have even more stuff to manage as if I don't have enough...

Me and Alexis B. haven't been vibin' too well lately...I found out...well...she told me she likes this dude...I was like that sucks cuz I like you...I guess that don't really matter when you don't get up what it takes to say what you need to say when it needs to be said. I've never been the shy type...but, it something about her that actually makes me act so jittery around her.

But, anyway...I really need to just do me...I look at it like love will eventually come to me. I'm tired of chasing it, which isn't the right thing to do at all. Right now I need to focus on me, which is really hard to do when I hate being lonely and all.

C • A • N • C • E • R: Most Amazing Kisser Very high sex appeal. Great in bed!!! Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak in bed. Spontaneous. Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

--Antoine M.